Sunday, August 10, 2008

Conversations With April


If you ever see April on the feeds or Showtime, there's no reason not to mute. Just refer back to this post, as this is EVERY conversation that she has with Ollie (outside of demanding where Ollie deposits some bodily fluids):

April: OMG, can you believe Keesha is such a bitch?

Ollie: Mmmm-hmmmm.

April: I've been nothing but sweet to that bitch. I don't deserve to be treated this way.

Ollie: I know, April.

April: She's friends with Memphis just to piss me off. He shouldn't be here. He already won a three million dollar car.

Ollie: Mmm-hmmmm.

April: I'm tired of being stabbed in the back by everybody. I swear I'm the most caring person in this house.

Ollie: You are, April.

April: I bet Keesha has never had to work a day in her pathetic life. You know I work at least an hour a day, and it's sooooooo hard.

Ollie: Mmmm-hmmm.

April: I've never said anything bad about anybody in this house, especially that stupid bitch and those other pathetic morons.

Ollie: I know, April.

April: Even Jerry. Yesterday, I saw him say hi to her. Talk about a slap to my face.

Ollie: Yep.

April: Even you, Ollie. I see the way you look at her when her fat ass is hanging out of her bikini. God, it's just pathetic the way she struts her body around here. At least I wear classy heels.

Ollie: I'm sorry, baby.

April: And why the fuck were you flirting with that cow Janelle? Sometimes you disgust me.

Ollie: It's not my fault she was talking to me. I'm sorry.

April: And then Libra wasn't even thankful that I made her a birthday cake. She knows I hate her, but I'm so wonderful that I set that aside and tried to give her a special treat.

Ollie: You did, April.

April: I've had it harder in this house than anybody. It's so hard to save everybody every single week, and then they treat me like that?

Ollie: They're just jealous of you, April.

April: America knows how wonderful I am. They know that I'm a beautiful, caring person who puts everybody's happiness before my own. Do you think CBS will air our wedding?

Ollie: Mmm-hmmm...wait a second!

April: Can you imagine how perfect it will be?

Ollie: What did you just say?

April: Are you ready for bed?

Ollie: Yeah, let's go.

23 comments:

Christine said...

move a little closer, Scott, it's stroking time!!

excellent post.

took the words right out of her mouth!!!

Scott said...

Yummy, Christine. I could use a good stroking!

Christine said...

happy to oblige ;)

I love the convos going on right now, Keesha, renny Michelle, Dan and Memphia are laughing and joking and having a blast in the spa room ejjoying each other and the craziness from last night

meanwhile Jerry, April and Ollie are out by the spa all serious and negative and nasty having the same game convo they've had for weeks...

ale said...

It tells you a lot about the genuinely good people in the house.

Christine said...

where does michelle fall in all of this??? she seems to be doing a masterful job of floating between the two groups...which one is she most loyal to??

or am I giving her too much credit??

Anonymous said...

LOVE it!! I think this is the best post yet!! Now I won't feel like I am missing something important when I mute it!!

I was just thinking the same thing Christine! It was nice to see them laughing and having a good time. But now Michelle is up in the HOH with April! UGH!!

Oh and this thing about suspicions about DAN is making me nervous! Leave the poor boy alone!!

Anonymous said...

Ok I am writing to vent! Right now Ollie and Jerry are talking in the backyard and Jerry just said he hates Dan. UGH!! That old man has to go!! Please, please, please don't let April, Ollie or Jerry win HOH this week because seriously I don't know if I can handle it!!

Ok, I am done now!! Thanks!!

Anonymous said...

You better leave Jerry alone, if he keeps seeing all of them hanging out together, he will take lybra down and boot one of them out. They would then have the stonger players left.. Go jerry Go Jerry Go jerry

Anonymous said...

OF COURSE CHRISTINE, YOU ARE GIVING HER WAY TO MUCH CREDIT. SHE DOESNT HAVE A CLUE WHAT SHE IS TALKING ABOUT. SHES NOT ALIGNED WITH NO ONE SO SHE IS BUILDING FRIENDS. MEMPHIS WILL CONTROL HER THINKING FOR SURE. WE WILL SEE IF A/O/J WINS HOH AND PUTS MEMPHIS UP. LETS SEE HOW SHE REACTS TO THAT. ALSO, NO MATTER WHO COMES TO HER WITH INFO, SHE IS SO STUCK ON HOW SHE HAS FIGURED SOMETHING OUT, THAT SHE IS NOT LISTENING TO THEM ANYWAY.

EVERYBODY IS LISTENING TO HER NOW BECAUSE SHE HAS THE POWER BUT I BET YOU AFTER IT IS GONE, THEY WILL BE TALKING ABOUT HER NUT CASE SCENERIOS

SHES A LOOSE CANNON AND THATS IT.. SHE WILL TALK HERSELF OUT OF THE GAME.. KINDA LIKE NATALIE OF BB9

LMFAO

Anonymous said...

OH LAWD, MICHELLE DONE FIGURED IT OUT AGAIN... DANS GETTING MONEY- FOR GOING TO THE HOH BATHROOM

CHI-CHING..... LMFAO

AND SHE WONT LET IT GO... YOU CANT EVEN TALK GAME WITH HER BECAUSE SHE CANT SWAY AWAY FROM WHAT SHE JUST FIGURED OUT

WHAT A FUKING LUNATIC

ITS VERY HARD TO STOMACH THIS ACTIVITY NOW.. NEED SOME TUMS

LMFAO

Anonymous said...

Capital Annon. I can't believe I am going to say this but I COMPLETELY agree with you about Michelle!!

Raven said...

I couldn't stop laughing when I read this.

Anonymous said...

THATS OK NON-CAP ANON.. YOU CAN AGREE WITH ME SOMETIME.. EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE, I GET IT RIGHT

LMFAO

Anonymous said...

HEY SCOTT DONT WORRY ABOUT IT... I BET A 1000 TO 1 SHE WILL BE BACK TO STROKE YOU TOMORROW

LMFAO

Anonymous said...

I've never been a big Libra fan but I am really feeling sorry for her! How awful would it be to be totally isolated!! Poor thing! I think she is getting a bad wrap!

Anonymous said...

That is the best post ever....that conversation is spot on!!!!! You could have also added that Memphis has a new car that is worth $(DayNumber * 10,000) dollars!!!

I would love to see April's ugly face when she leaves the house and reads all of the blogs about the kind of bitch she is....go to hell April, and Jerry, you follow!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

I just had to change my vote on your sidebar poll. I do believe Karma is a Bitch!! April and Michelle are just SO Mean. Making fun of Libra how she only comes out of the room when she's hungry etc.

Karma is Bitch!! I can't wait until they brought down off their Ugly Ass High Horse!!

Ok I am going to bed. It's not normal that I get this upset over a stupid Show!!!

Night!!

Anonymous said...

ollie, you are one of the weakest brothers i have ever seen. i can tell which side of the tracks you were bought up on.

what the hell you keep saying you sorry for, you havent done anything

Janice said...

I know this is totally off topic, but it came to me last night during the show who Manchelle reminds me of. I think she is a dead ringer for Michael Jackson in the Thriller video when he turns into the ghoul. The cheekbones and the bulging eyes. If someone more tech savy than me could do a seperated at birth, that would be awesome. P.S. Thanks for all who do re-caps for those of us too cheap to buy the feeds. You are by far the first site I check to find out what's going on.

Anonymous said...

LOL That was great, and every word you said she has said :) She is so pretty, she thinks, wait till she reads all the stuff America really feels about her !!

Anonymous said...

Excellent post...Except you left out the part about her batting her eyelids so much she'll fly away!

Anonymous said...

Great post..........and oh, so true. You have April and her little doggie correctly labeled in every aspect. And might I add, go home Jerry.......you vile, cruel, filthy mouthed, miserable man. He gives senior citizens everywhere a bad rap!

Anonymous said...

It will be hilarious when Ollie drops her like a bad habit....